On Thursday, Nov 6, my boyfriend didn't come as expected.
I was excited. Happy. I was anticipating his presence. But he didn't and I started getting worried.
What if something happened? What if he's dead? Why didn't he send me a message that wouldn't be able to come on the night of our anniversary. Thinking of the negative "what ifs" made me numb; as I lost control of the tears streaming down my face. I wanted to make a blog entry about it but I lost my way with words. I just couldn't find the words to write.
I could only scribble "I am under repair!"
We exchanged text messages with his mother. The next day, the next, and the next, still no sign. I didn't know what to do. But life goes on. I still worked. I tried to fake the cheerfulness that I always have when talking to my students and I did! Faked it until it became true.
It was a mentally and emotionally exhausting experience. When you are waiting indefinitely; you hope for something that you're not sure if it exists or not. But I definitely learned something, it was a humbling experience and God caused it to show me insights I wouldn't have noticed in ordinary situations.
What did I realize? Can you guess...
I was excited. Happy. I was anticipating his presence. But he didn't and I started getting worried.
What if something happened? What if he's dead? Why didn't he send me a message that wouldn't be able to come on the night of our anniversary. Thinking of the negative "what ifs" made me numb; as I lost control of the tears streaming down my face. I wanted to make a blog entry about it but I lost my way with words. I just couldn't find the words to write.
I could only scribble "I am under repair!"
We exchanged text messages with his mother. The next day, the next, and the next, still no sign. I didn't know what to do. But life goes on. I still worked. I tried to fake the cheerfulness that I always have when talking to my students and I did! Faked it until it became true.
It was a mentally and emotionally exhausting experience. When you are waiting indefinitely; you hope for something that you're not sure if it exists or not. But I definitely learned something, it was a humbling experience and God caused it to show me insights I wouldn't have noticed in ordinary situations.
What did I realize? Can you guess...
20 comment(s):
That you can live without your boyfriend? That he is not the one for you given he never let you know where he was?
You need a hug Pchi :)
Been there, done that so I can imagine what you feel. Pero, life goes on and try to take it day by day. It's a slow, excruciating process naman. Anyway, if you're really destined to be together, babalik at babalik siya sa iyo:) if not, there's a better fish out there. oh, i got a tag for you pala :D here's the link..http://www.pinaylighterside.com/2008/11/candle-of-love-hope-and-friendship.html
ha! Birthday ko yung anniv nyo?! c: ano nangyari ayaw ko maguess ng mali hehehe c:
have a poem for you at wow legs c:
Oh! A loss...
Yes you'd get really pretty worried. I'm glad you are in good terms with his mother.
And she doesn't even know where's your man?
oh nov 6 is my bday,,
send some important text messages. and we will see ano reaction nya.
i am not good in guessing. i can only wish you to feel better.
take care girl..just know there's more to life.
i have no idea? ka-relate ako sayo pchi... been into that kind of situation din na di na xa nagcocol, text or paramdam, he's not even answerin cols... hmm.. masakit tlga but life goes on ika nga... (am i speaking to myself na ba? lolz) neways, i hope you'll feel better...
what happened to him...?
i would like to invite you to my new blog: http://troubleshoot101.blogspot.com
it's about common computer issues and how to fix them..
:)
i am sorry to hear it :-); i have been there and i know how you feel, wished i am there to give you a hug. just think of it that he is not for you.
So sorry for him pchi.. I wish you the best though..
awwww, i knew it.. when you wrote that site owner under repair, I can feel that you're suffering from something...
They're all right pchi.. just be strong...
thanks for all your support and encourage pals
@lily
maybe
@pasti
thanks for the hug
@marites
you're right. thanks for that.
@iceah
oh, sorry I wsn't able to greet you na tuloy (happy birthday kahit belated)
i will continue this post... and tell you what
@gem
yes, I am close to both his parents... he made sure I had good relationship with them
@faye
oh, it's your bday pala and i didn't greet you? huhu. tsk tsk. belated ate!
@nyl
thanks for that nyl. that means a lot already
@miah
same-same jud ta ug experience no? haha. karemember ka atong pms issue. hehelagi. ife goes on
@xan_factor
@i didn't know
will check it, thanks!
@cecile
thanks for the hug. it means a lot
@romy
thanks romy... :)
@ckulit
God is making me strong ate. thanks for that
hahaha kahinumdom pa diay ka atong pms issue pch.. cge lang, okay lang na.. try paminaw mga praising songs kya? ako that's what I do, diba mugaan imu feeling, then pray, go out w/ friends... kron mejo okay nko hehehe..
my prayers for you... :)
it's so hard. i don't want to imagine that feeling of waiting and waiting and asking myself "What's wrong?"
I hope you are now "repaired" :)
@miah
thanks for that tip. I agree... that would be really helpful
@khaye
thanks sis
@berryblitz
yes, berry! thankfully, I am now
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